“When D-i-v-o-r-c-e Hit The Stars”‏

“When people divorce, it’s always such a tragedy. At the same time, if people stay together it can be even worse.” Monica Bellucci

divorce (n.)
late 14c., from Old French divorce (14c.), from Latin divortium “separation, dissolution of marriage,” from divertere “to separate, leave one’s husband, turn aside”

“Divorce is probably as painful as death”. William Shatner

“Men, Women, Mourning Divorce is just the most awful thing in the world”. John Denver”

Childhood’s end

“My parent’s divorce and hard times at school, all those things combined to mold me, to make me grow up quicker. And it gave me the drive to pursue my dreams that I wouldn’t necessarily have had otherwise”. Christina Aguilera

“I had a really good childhood up until I was nine, then a classic case of divorce really affected me”. Kurt Cobain

Our little boy is four years old
and quite a little man
so we spell out the words we don’t
want him to understand
like T-O-Y or maybe S-U-R-P-R-I-S-E
but the words we’re hiding from him now
tear the heart right out of me,
our D-I-V-O-R-C-E becomes final today
me and little J-O-E
will be going away
I love you both
and this will be pure H-E- double L for me
oh I wish that we could stop this D-I-V-O-R-C-E
Watch him smile
he thinks its christmas
or his 5th birthday
and he thinks C-U-S-T-O-D-Y
spells fun or play
I spell out all the hurtin’ words
and turn my head when I speak
‘cos i can’t spell away this hurt
thats dripping down my cheek
our D-I-V-O-R-C-E becomes final today
me and little J-O-E
will be going away
I love you both
and this will be pure H-E- double L for me
oh I wish that we could stop this D-I-V-O-R-C-E

Songwriter(s): Bobby Braddock, Alan Jay Lerner, Curly Putman, Burton Lane, Sheb Wooley – Copyright: Chappell & Co. Inc., Sony/ATV Tree Publishing

“Dad could talk about peace and love out loud to the world, but he could never show it to the people who supposedly meant the most to him: his wife and son. How can you talk about peace and love and have a family in bits and pieces – no communication, adultery, divorce? You can’t do it, not if you’re being true and honest with yourself”. Julian Lennon

Too Late for Goodbyes by Julian Lennon

Released in the UK in September, 1984, this was the first single for Julian Lennon, who is John Lennon’s first son. (His first American single was “Valotte.”) His mother Cynthia got a divorce from John when Julian was just five years old, and for the next nine years, Julian rarely saw his dad. When he was 14, Julian reconnected with his dad and made occasional visits to his home in New York City.

Given his personal history, this song could be interpreted as Julian Lennon’s message to his dad, who left him when he was young. Julian tells us that this is not the case.

“Initially it was about a girl, a relationship,” he said. “Then it was a few other friends in the room and I was bouncing ideas back and forth. I just ended up with that particular phrase and title and it seemed to stick. So it made sense to me, and voilà! Bob’s your uncle. That’s it. No hidden agendas on that one.”

The video did very well on MTV, which Lennon credits for much of his success:

“The early days of MTV certainly had a tremendous effect on most everybody at that point in time because that’s when I felt the industry was a bit more exciting, because you really did in those days look forward to not only the latest new songs that were coming out by your favorite artists, but you wanted to see what they looked like, and sometimes that was the closest you were going to get if you couldn’t go to their shows.” Julian Lennon

Sam Peckinpah, who directed the films Pat Garrett and Billy the Kid and Convoy, directed the video. He also directed Lennon’s next video, which was for his song “Valotte.”

divorce (v.)
late 14c., from Old French divorcer, from divorce (see divorce (n.)). Related: Divorced; divorcing.

Money, Money

“Divorce is the one human tragedy that reduces everything to cash”. Rita Mae Brown

“The biggest financial pitfall in life is divorce. And the biggest reason for divorce is marriage”. Gene Simmons

During ABBA‘s active years, Fältskog and Ulvaeus were very much in love, and married, as were Lyngstad and Andersson, although both couples later divorced. At the height of their popularity, both relationships were suffering strain which ultimately resulted in the collapse of the Ulvaeus-Fältskog marriage in 1979 and the Andersson-Lyngstad marriage in 1981. These relationship changes were reflected in the group’s music, with later compositions including more introspective, brooding, dark lyrics.

divorcee (n.)
“divorced woman,” 1813, from French divorcée, noun use of fem. past participle of divorcer (see divorce (v.)). The male equivalent in French is divorcé.

Emotional Rescue

“After my divorce, painting took me out of panic mode and into a serene, calm place. I could absolutely lose myself”. Jane Seymour

“Obviously, you go through a lot of emotional turmoil in a divorce”. David Byrne

Writing about divorce

“I’ve never had a divorce, but I’ve seen so many of my friends, my sister, my family go through that stuff, so I try to write for the people that can’t write about it. I take on their sorrow, so I’m able to kind of express it, or their joy”. Dolly Parton

“I always used to look at books and wonder how anybody could come up with so many words. But my divorce and then falling in love with somebody else has released in me an ability to write in other ways apart from songs”. Roger Waters

Dear, back my wounded heart restore,
And turn away thy powerful eyes
Flatter my willing soul no more,
Love must not hope what Fate denies.
Take, take away thy smiles and kisses
Thy Love wounds deeper then Disdain,
For he that sees the Heaven he misses,
Sustains two Hels, of losse and pain.
Shouldst thou some others suit prefer,
I might return thy scorn to thee,
And learn Apostasie of her
Who taught me first Idolatry.
Or in thy unrelenting breast
Should I disdain or coynesse move,
He by thy hate might be realest,
Who now is prisoner to thy love.
Since then unkind Fate will divorce
Those whom Affection long united,
Be thou as cruel as this force,
And I in death shall be delighted.
Thus whilst so many suppliants woe
And beg they may thy pitty prove,
I onely for thy scorn do sue,
‘ charity here not to love.

“You can fire your secretary, divorce your spouse, abandon your children. But they remain your co-authors forever”. Ellen Goodman



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